April 8, 2026
131: Pack Extra Underwear And Get A Postnup
Send us Fan Mail Your spouse just found out they're inheriting money, and now they want a postnup. Do you panic, or do you see it for what it actually is? In this episode, Jessica and Brandon break down the real purpose of prenups and postnups, share why they got one after almost a decade of marriage, and explain why the stigma around these agreements is costing couples more than they realize. Spoiler: your state already wrote your prenup. You just don't know what it says. They cover what to ...
Your spouse just found out they're inheriting money, and now they want a postnup. Do you panic, or do you see it for what it actually is?
In this episode, Jessica and Brandon break down the real purpose of prenups and postnups, share why they got one after almost a decade of marriage, and explain why the stigma around these agreements is costing couples more than they realize. Spoiler: your state already wrote your prenup. You just don't know what it says.
They cover what to actually include in a postnup (inheritance, kids' accounts, mortgages, debt), why you don't divorce the same person you married, and why building these protections while love is high is the smartest financial move a couple can make.
Think of it as love insurance, you hope you never need it, but you'll be grateful it's there.
Subscribe to The Sugar Daddy Podcast newsletter
Head over to our YouTube channel to catch this episode in full video form.
Apply to be a guest on the show.
You can also email us at: thesugardaddypodcast@gmail.com
Connect with us on Instagram
We’re most active over at @thesugardaddypodcast
Chat with Brandon
Want to work together? Learn more about Brandon
Book a free 30-min call to see if it's a fit.
Show us some love, hit subscribe, leave a five star rating, and drop a quick review!
Money, relationships, and the mindset to master both. Hosted by financial advisor Brandon and his wife Jessica, The Sugar Daddy Podcast breaks down how to build wealth, unpack old money beliefs, and have real conversations about love and finances. Their mission? To help couples and individuals grow rich in every sense of the word: emotionally, relationally and financially.
...Chapters
00:00 - The Postnup Question That Stings
00:32 - Welcome And Why This Matters
02:16 - A Real Inheritance Postnup Scenario
03:34 - Postnups As Seatbelts Not Exit Plans
05:18 - How We Handled Inheritance And Windfalls
08:29 - Divorce Reality And Planning With Love
10:23 - Future Wealth And The 401k Problem
12:22 - Mortgages And Debts You Must Clarify
16:12 - Protecting Kids Accounts With Shared Access
19:07 - Love Insurance And Writing Your Rules
22:00 - Subscribe Share And Send Questions
Transcript
WEBVTT
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000
How would you feel if your spouse asked you for a post-nup seven years into marriage?
00:00:06.559 --> 00:00:07.759
Think about that.
00:00:08.640 --> 00:00:20.559
In today's episode, we are talking about prenups and postnups, why people feel offended when one spouse brings it up, and what it actually means and why it can be protection on both sides.
00:00:20.719 --> 00:00:21.440
Stay tuned.
00:00:21.679 --> 00:00:23.359
Sugar Daddy Podcast, yo.
00:00:23.839 --> 00:00:26.079
Learn how to make them pockets grow.
00:00:26.320 --> 00:00:28.480
Fundamental freedoms where we go.
00:00:28.879 --> 00:00:31.039
Smart investments, money flow.
00:00:32.240 --> 00:00:41.840
Welcome everyone to the Sugar Daddy Podcast, where we help you build a clear financial plan so you can feel confident and in control of your money.
00:00:42.079 --> 00:00:46.079
I'm Jessica and I'm here with my husband, Brandon.
00:00:46.399 --> 00:00:46.880
Hello.
00:00:48.079 --> 00:00:49.920
OGs, welcome back.
00:00:50.079 --> 00:00:52.079
Thank you for being with us week over week.
00:00:52.159 --> 00:01:01.600
And if you're new here, we hope that you will stick around because we have a lot of fun every Wednesday when we release episodes and nerd out about all things money.
00:01:01.759 --> 00:01:03.840
Today, babe, what are we talking about?
00:01:04.159 --> 00:01:08.959
Today, we are talking about instead of pre-nups, we're talking about post-nups.
00:01:09.280 --> 00:01:10.400
Dun dun dun.
00:01:10.799 --> 00:01:18.159
And for anybody new here or anybody who hasn't caught our episodes, we actually got a post-nup.
00:01:18.319 --> 00:01:20.319
Was it 2024 or 2025?
00:01:20.480 --> 00:01:20.879
Last year?
00:01:21.040 --> 00:01:21.359
I don't know.
00:01:21.439 --> 00:01:22.000
What is time?
00:01:22.159 --> 00:01:23.280
I think last year was when we finished it.
00:01:23.519 --> 00:01:24.239
When we finished it?
00:01:24.400 --> 00:01:24.719
Okay.
00:01:24.879 --> 00:01:29.599
So we have episodes with our dear friend Aaron Thomas, who is our attorney.
00:01:29.680 --> 00:01:32.079
He also is the founder of prenups.com.
00:01:32.319 --> 00:01:34.480
He is a wealth of knowledge.
00:01:34.640 --> 00:01:39.920
And we learned so much from having him on the podcast that we asked him to do our postnup.
00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:43.599
So we are going to hit 10 years of marriage this year.
00:01:43.840 --> 00:01:45.599
Happy early anniversary, babe.
00:01:46.079 --> 00:01:54.879
And uh we decided to do a postnup because after learning so much from Aaron, we decided that it was part of a comprehensive financial plan.
00:01:55.040 --> 00:02:06.400
Yeah, we had no intentions of doing a postnup, but we had were lucky enough to be connected with him and did a podcast episode, and he completely changed our thought process about how we view them.
00:02:06.640 --> 00:02:11.280
Yes, but I think there was still a lot of misconception around prenups and post-nups.
00:02:11.439 --> 00:02:14.080
And so I came across this um this post.
00:02:14.159 --> 00:02:16.639
So I'm gonna read it and then we're gonna talk about it.
00:02:16.800 --> 00:02:16.960
Okay.
00:02:17.120 --> 00:02:17.439
Okay.
00:02:17.840 --> 00:02:22.080
So it says, I've been married for seven years with my partner for 10.
00:02:22.240 --> 00:02:31.599
Her father has died, and she is expected to inherit a substantial amount of money, not sure how much, as he has lots of stocks and shares that he kept quiet about.
00:02:31.840 --> 00:02:34.080
She now wants a post-nuptial agreement.
00:02:34.319 --> 00:02:38.000
So if we ever get divorced, I won't take any of it.
00:02:38.159 --> 00:02:43.199
She doesn't understand why I feel how I feel, but it doesn't make me feel good.
00:02:44.479 --> 00:02:50.159
So there wasn't really a question here of like, why should I, you know, what should I be feeling or how should I handle this?
00:02:50.319 --> 00:02:52.960
So we're just gonna fill in our blanks here.
00:02:53.360 --> 00:03:01.280
Um, and I think the misconception is still with prenups and postnups, you are planning for a divorce.
00:03:01.520 --> 00:03:01.759
Yeah.
00:03:01.919 --> 00:03:09.039
And I think that's kind of the sentiment that I get when I read this post is well, if we're not together, I don't want you to have any of my money.
00:03:09.120 --> 00:03:10.560
So that's what I'm planning for.
00:03:11.360 --> 00:03:14.240
I it's it's so hard for me to wrap.
00:03:14.879 --> 00:03:24.719
I guess now it's hard for me to wrap my mind around when people are like, if you want to put these things, these things in place, that you're planning for the marriage to not to fail.
00:03:24.879 --> 00:03:32.479
Because there's so much planning that we do in other aspects of our life, but we're not looking at, oh, this is gonna end up terrible.
00:03:32.639 --> 00:03:33.919
It's just like, just in case.
00:03:34.159 --> 00:03:34.800
And you know what?
00:03:34.879 --> 00:03:38.080
I heard I saw this actually this morning, which is funny.
00:03:38.240 --> 00:03:42.639
Um and I I've never heard this analogy before, but I thought it was really amazing.
00:03:42.800 --> 00:03:54.960
And this woman, as she's actually the founder of Fleur, um, I don't remember her name right now, but she was talking about uh prenups and post-nups, and she said that she equates it to wearing a seatbelt.
00:03:55.120 --> 00:04:02.000
Like, I'm gonna get in the car with you, and I think that you're a safe driver, but I'm still gonna put my seatbelt on just in case.
00:04:02.240 --> 00:04:05.759
I was gonna even go even more even more like a weird tangent.
00:04:05.919 --> 00:04:10.719
What I was like, when you go on vacation, I think most of us pack more underwear than we need.
00:04:10.960 --> 00:04:11.199
Yeah.
00:04:11.280 --> 00:04:12.960
What is it about vacation underwear?
00:04:13.120 --> 00:04:20.480
So, like, but like I don't have any plans on shitting myself during the day where like I need some extra underwear, but just in case.
00:04:20.720 --> 00:04:20.959
Okay.
00:04:21.040 --> 00:04:22.560
So that's the remind my own.
00:04:23.519 --> 00:04:30.480
There is so much content on the internet, on social media, about how much underwear women pack when we go on vacation.
00:04:30.720 --> 00:04:32.079
I pack more than I need as a guy.
00:04:32.319 --> 00:04:36.240
But it's like, when was the last time you changed your underwear in the middle of the day?
00:04:36.399 --> 00:04:38.560
Just because, like you don't do that.
00:04:38.720 --> 00:04:42.000
Like unless you're on vacation and you're like, oh, I've been walking for 10 hours.
00:04:42.079 --> 00:04:43.040
Like, I need, you know.
00:04:43.199 --> 00:04:47.439
But I just think it's hilarious because, like, why are we always overpacking underwear?
00:04:47.600 --> 00:04:51.279
I mean, I feel like women, it's a bare minimum, two pairs per day.
00:04:51.439 --> 00:04:53.279
Some women are doing three and four pairs a day.
00:04:53.439 --> 00:04:58.240
So I think about all the things that we have a backup plan for that we're not planning on happening.
00:04:58.399 --> 00:04:58.639
Right.
00:04:58.800 --> 00:05:03.519
But when it's something so important, people are so adverse to actually having a plan.
00:05:03.759 --> 00:05:04.079
Right.
00:05:04.240 --> 00:05:15.360
Well, and I think if you go into it with the mindset of this is not going to work out, so I'm gonna protect myself, that's when the other person then can say, Well, why are you planning for the worst?
00:05:15.519 --> 00:05:18.160
Everything was fine, and now you're planning for the worst.
00:05:18.319 --> 00:05:34.560
And what I thought was interesting when I read this is that you and I had a very different conversation about inheritance because your inheritance will be significantly larger than anything that I get from my parents.
00:05:34.879 --> 00:05:53.839
And I wasn't offended by the fact that we wanted, we actually put a clause in our post snup about inheritance, which is your inheritance goes into your account, your private account, any inheritance that I get or any windfall really will go into my account.
00:05:54.000 --> 00:06:08.399
And then we added a clause that if we put a large amount of money, so a large amount for us is$5,000 or more, into our joint account, we actually need to have a letter that is notarized to make it community assets.
00:06:08.720 --> 00:06:17.439
So for example, like if, you know, in the future the inheritance comes and I decide, hey, it doesn't even have to be inheritance, it could be a bonus check or a commission check or something.
00:06:17.519 --> 00:06:20.879
And I'm like, hey, I wanted to I want this to be our money now.
00:06:22.319 --> 00:06:29.040
The process has to be done to, you know, basically show from a um um legal standpoint.
00:06:29.279 --> 00:06:32.959
Yes, legal standpoint, but then also just a trail of what we're doing.
00:06:33.279 --> 00:06:40.959
So that it's your money, quote unquote, and putting it into our joint account, it is now community property.
00:06:41.120 --> 00:07:00.959
And the reason we did this, and I think we all have experiences and stories, um but we're both products of divorce, and I vividly remember that my mom got an inheritance when her father passed away that she used towards the down payment of the home that I grew up in.
00:07:01.120 --> 00:07:12.319
Well, when my parents got divorced, and for 10 years after, I'm still hearing about this money that was used to put down on the home that was her money.
00:07:12.560 --> 00:07:14.560
And I was like, I don't want, I don't want to do that.
00:07:14.720 --> 00:07:16.639
Like, I don't live in the past like that.
00:07:16.959 --> 00:07:20.399
And I did not want that to be the case, right?
00:07:20.480 --> 00:07:24.800
If it's like, hey, we have this windfall, or at one point in our relationship, I was in sales.
00:07:24.879 --> 00:07:29.360
So I was making, you know, commission like large commission checks at times.
00:07:29.920 --> 00:07:47.439
If I put that into our joint account and then we took this amazing vacation and we'd get a divorce, I don't want to be the person that's like, well, back in 2005, I spent 2005, I was still in college, whatever, you know, X amount of money on this vacation.
00:07:47.519 --> 00:07:49.680
And then like our kids are never gonna hear the end of it.
00:07:49.759 --> 00:07:53.600
No, like once it's community property, I don't want to, I don't want to talk to you about it anymore.
00:07:53.920 --> 00:07:55.279
Present or divorced.
00:07:55.439 --> 00:08:02.319
And so there are protections that you can put into place to make sure that those kinds of conversations don't have to happen.
00:08:02.560 --> 00:08:08.800
And I don't think Brandon loves me any less, knowing that he is going to get a larger inheritance that I'm going to get.
00:08:08.879 --> 00:08:16.319
And I don't think that Brandon is fearful of me trying to quote unquote take his inheritance because he knows I'm going to get less of an inheritance.
00:08:16.560 --> 00:08:26.399
But regardless of those feelings, we now have protections in place that really make those feelings null and void because it's now his and it's now mine.
00:08:26.480 --> 00:08:29.279
And if we want to put it together, we have a process for that.
00:08:29.519 --> 00:08:31.519
So I think really what it is.
00:08:31.600 --> 00:08:39.679
So, like from the uh the man's standpoint and um what you just read, I think it's shifting your mindset to be honest with you.
00:08:40.000 --> 00:08:52.000
Because she says, because like the way that she's she's phrasing and the purpose of the postnup is if we do separate, which is what it's for in the event that we separate, focus on you guys aren't separating.
00:08:52.080 --> 00:08:57.120
So you could still benefit from the inheritance together at that point in time while you're still together.
00:08:57.279 --> 00:08:59.759
This is only if we don't work out, yeah.
00:08:59.919 --> 00:09:04.559
So like it's the worst case scenario, it's the insurance for the worst case scenario.
00:09:04.799 --> 00:09:11.600
And the thing is, is that it's I mean, like in the United States, statistically, you know, almost 50% of marriages end in divorce.
00:09:11.919 --> 00:09:14.240
So it's not this uncommon thing.
00:09:14.320 --> 00:09:17.759
It's not like, oh, I don't know anybody that's never ever gotten divorced.
00:09:17.919 --> 00:09:22.720
Like, no, my mom's been divorced four times and my dad and my dad twice.
00:09:22.879 --> 00:09:28.480
So it's very, you know, for me, it's we have seven divorces between our parents.
00:09:31.279 --> 00:09:34.159
Because it's actually really sad, but okay, seven.
00:09:34.320 --> 00:09:35.200
That's a lot.
00:09:35.519 --> 00:09:44.960
But the idea is that like I've seen what can happen when you don't have things in place, and I don't think anyone goes into marriage with the idea of getting divorced.
00:09:45.120 --> 00:09:48.080
Like, that's then you wouldn't you wouldn't get married in that scenario.
00:09:48.240 --> 00:09:54.000
But the reality is that life happens, people grow apart, people do things that sometimes you don't expect them to do.
00:09:54.159 --> 00:10:12.159
Like, so putting these protections in place while you guys are still loving each other, still in a good place, that is when it makes sense rather than waiting until something bad happens and then seeing one, if you can't even put anything in place, but then also in that standpoint, you are not probably liking that person as much as you did before.
00:10:12.320 --> 00:10:18.960
Yeah, Aaron on our episode said, why not create your own rules while love and respect are high?
00:10:19.200 --> 00:10:22.799
Like when you're clearly thinking about what's important to you, right?
00:10:23.039 --> 00:10:32.000
The other thing that he pointed out that I thought was so insightful is that we are, as millennials, as elder millennials, right?
00:10:32.080 --> 00:10:34.159
We are in our prime earning years.
00:10:34.399 --> 00:10:40.879
So when we got together, we a prenup was not even on our radar because it was, I mean, we owned homes.
00:10:40.960 --> 00:10:41.679
It should have been, right?
00:10:41.840 --> 00:10:43.919
We owned homes, we had careers, et cetera.
00:10:44.080 --> 00:10:47.519
But like it just wasn't people feel it's just to be wealthy.
00:10:47.679 --> 00:10:47.840
Right.
00:10:48.000 --> 00:10:52.080
Like you're, oh, you're not an NBA player or you're not a celebrity or you're not Taylor Swift.
00:10:52.159 --> 00:10:53.759
So why would I get a prenup?
00:10:54.159 --> 00:10:56.320
But like that's not at all what it's about.
00:10:56.480 --> 00:10:58.639
And so while you're growing, right?
00:10:58.720 --> 00:11:01.919
Like think about your 401k right now.
00:11:02.000 --> 00:11:04.879
What's gonna be in your 401k in 15 or 20 years?
00:11:05.039 --> 00:11:11.519
Like, I mean, Fidelity already reported that they are at an all-time high of 401k millionaires.
00:11:11.759 --> 00:11:15.919
You have clients that have over a million dollars in their 401k.
00:11:16.240 --> 00:11:21.039
So think about somebody saying, okay, now you have to split that.
00:11:21.440 --> 00:11:25.360
Yeah, prenups and post-ups aren't just for where you're at today.
00:11:25.600 --> 00:11:27.519
It's where you could be 20 years in the future.
00:11:27.600 --> 00:11:30.320
Like, you know, say you're 30 years old and you're getting married now.
00:11:30.480 --> 00:11:34.000
It may not be for right now, but say, like, you know, 20 years in the future, now you're 50.
00:11:34.080 --> 00:11:34.320
Yeah.
00:11:34.480 --> 00:11:40.879
And now the marriage isn't working, you want to separate, you now have accumulated some things over that 20-year period that maybe you want to protect.
00:11:41.200 --> 00:11:49.039
And we have enough friends who've gone through divorce, and the the recurring sentiment is you do not divorce the same person you married.
00:11:49.279 --> 00:11:49.600
No.
00:11:49.759 --> 00:11:58.080
And so if you're thinking, oh, this person would never do that, or this person would never come after this, or this you don't know who that person is gonna be.
00:11:58.320 --> 00:12:00.000
Who they become because who they become.
00:12:00.240 --> 00:12:06.240
Because let's be honest, none of us are our best when we're upset and you know, dealing strictly in emotion.
00:12:06.320 --> 00:12:12.159
Now, imagine like it's like for me, like, you know, one of the worst things that could happen is us getting divorced.
00:12:12.320 --> 00:12:15.919
And so I'm not probably gonna be in my, you know, most logical.
00:12:18.159 --> 00:12:19.840
Even though I'm a very logical person, yeah, yeah.
00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:22.399
I don't think that's where it's gonna be coming from at that moment.
00:12:22.639 --> 00:12:22.879
Right.
00:12:23.120 --> 00:12:30.480
So I'm grateful that we had, you know, the for us it wasn't, but the quote unquote hard conversation with Aaron.
00:12:30.639 --> 00:12:37.919
You know, he was he was essentially our mediator, and we got to have the really tough tough conversations, you know.
00:12:38.000 --> 00:12:43.919
And I mean, Aaron did say that a lot of times things come out that people didn't share, right?
00:12:44.080 --> 00:12:50.080
Whether it's maybe debts, maybe it's accounts that have large amounts of money in them that the other spouse didn't know about.
00:12:50.240 --> 00:12:59.200
Like we didn't have any secrets to begin with, but it also gives you the opportunity, for example, and we have episodes on this, so go back into the archives and listen to it.
00:12:59.360 --> 00:13:02.720
But for example, our mortgage is in my name.
00:13:02.960 --> 00:13:04.559
Brandon is on the deed.
00:13:04.720 --> 00:13:12.879
If we were to dissolve our marriage because of our post snup, this is now an asset and a liability for both of us.
00:13:13.120 --> 00:13:20.320
So technically, without the post snup, because Brandon's not on the mortgage, he could walk away and be like, girl, that's your problem.
00:13:21.039 --> 00:13:25.440
And now I'm stuck with a huge mortgage that we went into together.
00:13:25.519 --> 00:13:30.480
And at the time it made financial sense for only one of us to be on the mortgage and all the things.
00:13:31.039 --> 00:13:36.240
But in the event of a divorce, this needs to be a liability and an asset for both of us.
00:13:36.320 --> 00:13:40.320
And so those are the kinds of things that you can detail, right?
00:13:40.559 --> 00:13:41.600
My student loans.
00:13:41.759 --> 00:13:42.559
Oh, what were you gonna say?
00:13:42.799 --> 00:13:53.519
I was gonna say, like, kind of like bringing it back to the original pose, like I don't even know if he from the way that he wrote it makes me think that he's not even sure if he knows how he should feel about it.
00:13:53.679 --> 00:13:53.840
Right.
00:13:54.080 --> 00:13:55.679
So I feel like he's thinking he's confused.
00:13:55.840 --> 00:14:01.919
I think I feel like he's thinking about it in the standard terms of a prenup, the way that most people think about a prenup is that you're planning to fail.
00:14:02.080 --> 00:14:02.240
Yes.
00:14:02.480 --> 00:14:04.159
So he's like according to that.
00:14:04.320 --> 00:14:10.639
Like, why, like, if she's planning to fail, like is she gonna like has she been like feeling like she wants to leave or whatever?
00:14:10.879 --> 00:14:12.960
Like, so I think maybe she's And this is like the catalyst.
00:14:13.440 --> 00:14:22.639
He's spiraling maybe a little bit in that aspect rather than just having a genuine conversation with his um spouse to kind of get more clarity on the situation.
00:14:22.960 --> 00:14:30.960
Well, and speaking of clarity, the big part of this was that was missing was they don't know what the amount is, and it doesn't even sound like the wife knows.
00:14:31.039 --> 00:14:35.679
So because a like a a big amount is it could vary from people to people.
00:14:35.840 --> 00:14:41.600
Yeah, like for example, like if we were to inherit dollars, that is not a life-changing amount of money.
00:14:41.759 --> 00:14:45.120
No, but like not for us, not for us, not for us, it's not it's not life-changing.
00:14:45.200 --> 00:14:47.039
We're like, oh, will I take it 100%?
00:14:47.360 --> 00:14:48.399
Can I put it to good use?
00:14:50.879 --> 00:14:53.120
But am I going to stop working tomorrow?
00:14:53.279 --> 00:14:55.200
Are we gonna like buy a brand new house?
00:14:55.440 --> 00:14:56.559
No, none of that.
00:14:56.639 --> 00:15:02.480
Our life is still gonna continue the same as compared to like, oh, we inherited$10 million tomorrow.
00:15:02.879 --> 00:15:05.039
Yeah, our life would look very different.
00:15:05.759 --> 00:15:14.960
I almost feel like they're in a really good spot not knowing, because this is stuff that they could be uncovering in the postnup process, right?
00:15:15.120 --> 00:15:23.120
Which is what are our assets, what are our debts, what is ours, what is yours, what is mine, and then put rules and parameters around that.
00:15:23.279 --> 00:15:27.120
I think that's the most important part of all of this is really understanding.
00:15:27.360 --> 00:15:31.600
For example, my student loans you currently pay.
00:15:32.240 --> 00:15:40.799
But in the event that we get a divorce, that is now my liability solely and is not Brandon's.
00:15:40.960 --> 00:15:45.759
But because we're happily married, it's just actually one of those debts that you kind of just took on.
00:15:46.000 --> 00:15:48.399
Yeah, because I mean, like the the pot's the pot.
00:15:48.639 --> 00:15:49.519
The pot is the pot.
00:15:50.240 --> 00:15:50.639
Yes.
00:15:50.799 --> 00:16:02.080
So that just happens to be the one thing that like that you pay that's actually mine, but in the event that we are not married anymore, obviously, like that's not his student loan, it's mine.
00:16:02.240 --> 00:16:05.840
So now that kind of comes back over to me as my liability.
00:16:06.000 --> 00:16:12.320
Um, and so I just think that those things are really important to talk about.
00:16:12.559 --> 00:16:18.720
The other thing that came up is ownership of our children's accounts, which I thought was really interesting.
00:16:18.960 --> 00:16:19.120
Yeah.
00:16:19.279 --> 00:16:27.840
And that I could break that down a little bit more too, because um, so for a lot of the accounts that are for minors, you really only have one owner on them.
00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:34.159
So for example, like um with a 529 plan, there's really only you have one primary, you have one person that's the owner.
00:16:34.240 --> 00:16:39.919
Now you can have a um uh you know a secondary owner in the event of something happening to the primary.
00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:44.399
But with the 529 plan, since obviously I do what I do and I was the one that set them up, they're in my name.
00:16:44.480 --> 00:16:44.799
Right.
00:16:45.120 --> 00:16:49.440
But under our postnup, they are both under our both of our control.
00:16:49.679 --> 00:16:50.000
Right.
00:16:50.159 --> 00:16:53.679
Because, and we talked about how do people do this?
00:16:53.759 --> 00:17:06.319
And Aaron again explained that, you know, you think that you married somebody honest, you think that they're gonna operate a certain way, but if you don't have access and you don't see what's actually happening, you really don't know.
00:17:06.480 --> 00:17:17.359
And he's actually worked with people who, you know, mismanaged their children's accounts, or one partner thought that, you know, contributions were still continuing, et cetera, et cetera.
00:17:17.440 --> 00:17:24.960
And then all of a sudden that money was gone and was used to buy a new car or down payment on a house or liquidated for whatever reason.
00:17:25.200 --> 00:17:26.720
And I don't play those games.
00:17:27.039 --> 00:17:32.880
So I, you know, I was like, nope, we both pay into these accounts.
00:17:33.200 --> 00:17:43.920
They can have a primary owner, but access will have to remain for both of us so that we both have visibility into what's happening with these accounts that are meant for our children at all times.
00:17:44.079 --> 00:17:54.799
Now, again, in my head, Brandon would never do anything to harm our children, to take money from our children or anybody or any family member, et cetera.
00:17:55.119 --> 00:17:57.200
But again, people do crazy things.
00:17:57.279 --> 00:18:02.240
And even though I love him and trust him, if we were to dissolve our marriage, I need access invisibility.
00:18:02.480 --> 00:18:07.519
I mean, and the thing is too, is that there's all there's a variety of reasons why people could end up getting divorced, you know?
00:18:07.680 --> 00:18:08.000
Yeah.
00:18:08.160 --> 00:18:16.640
One, I I mean, this is probably a minority scenario, but like say, say if I had an injury and then I got it, I got addicted to painkillers.
00:18:16.799 --> 00:18:21.519
And then like I've never had an addictive personality, never, you know, been addicted to drugs or alcohol or anything like that.
00:18:21.599 --> 00:18:22.799
But then now I that happened.
00:18:23.039 --> 00:18:23.839
That went like dark.
00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:24.799
I'm just saying, like, dude.
00:18:24.960 --> 00:18:25.440
I mean, it happens.
00:18:25.839 --> 00:18:30.559
There are these things that happen where then like now you the person's not the same person you that they were before.
00:18:30.799 --> 00:18:35.440
Now you want to get divorced from them, and now maybe you cannot trust them with that type of money.
00:18:35.599 --> 00:18:35.759
Yeah.
00:18:35.920 --> 00:18:39.680
In regards to doing the things that they did before as a person that you formally knew them.
00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:44.240
So it's really about just putting in protections while everything is good.
00:18:44.400 --> 00:18:44.640
Yeah.
00:18:44.799 --> 00:18:46.160
Just like anything else in life.
00:18:46.240 --> 00:18:55.599
Like, once again, I might be gone for a week, but maybe I pack two and a half weeks worth of underwear, even though you know I'm I can control my bowels.
00:18:59.440 --> 00:18:59.920
Yes.
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000
00:00:06.559 --> 00:00:07.759
00:00:08.640 --> 00:00:20.559
00:00:20.719 --> 00:00:21.440
00:00:21.679 --> 00:00:23.359
00:00:23.839 --> 00:00:26.079
00:00:26.320 --> 00:00:28.480
00:00:28.879 --> 00:00:31.039
00:00:32.240 --> 00:00:41.840
00:00:42.079 --> 00:00:46.079
00:00:46.399 --> 00:00:46.880
00:00:48.079 --> 00:00:49.920
00:00:50.079 --> 00:00:52.079
00:00:52.159 --> 00:01:01.600
00:01:01.759 --> 00:01:03.840
00:01:04.159 --> 00:01:08.959
00:01:09.280 --> 00:01:10.400
00:01:10.799 --> 00:01:18.159
00:01:18.319 --> 00:01:20.319
00:01:20.480 --> 00:01:20.879
00:01:21.040 --> 00:01:21.359
00:01:21.439 --> 00:01:22.000
00:01:22.159 --> 00:01:23.280
00:01:23.519 --> 00:01:24.239
00:01:24.400 --> 00:01:24.719
00:01:24.879 --> 00:01:29.599
00:01:29.680 --> 00:01:32.079
00:01:32.319 --> 00:01:34.480
00:01:34.640 --> 00:01:39.920
00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:43.599
00:01:43.840 --> 00:01:45.599
00:01:46.079 --> 00:01:54.879
00:01:55.040 --> 00:02:06.400
00:02:06.640 --> 00:02:11.280
00:02:11.439 --> 00:02:14.080
00:02:14.159 --> 00:02:16.639
00:02:16.800 --> 00:02:16.960
00:02:17.120 --> 00:02:17.439
00:02:17.840 --> 00:02:22.080
00:02:22.240 --> 00:02:31.599
00:02:31.840 --> 00:02:34.080
00:02:34.319 --> 00:02:38.000
00:02:38.159 --> 00:02:43.199
00:02:44.479 --> 00:02:50.159
00:02:50.319 --> 00:02:52.960
00:02:53.360 --> 00:03:01.280
00:03:01.520 --> 00:03:01.759
00:03:01.919 --> 00:03:09.039
00:03:09.120 --> 00:03:10.560
00:03:11.360 --> 00:03:14.240
00:03:14.879 --> 00:03:24.719
00:03:24.879 --> 00:03:32.479
00:03:32.639 --> 00:03:33.919
00:03:34.159 --> 00:03:34.800
00:03:34.879 --> 00:03:38.080
00:03:38.240 --> 00:03:42.639
00:03:42.800 --> 00:03:54.960
00:03:55.120 --> 00:04:02.000
00:04:02.240 --> 00:04:05.759
00:04:05.919 --> 00:04:10.719
00:04:10.960 --> 00:04:11.199
00:04:11.280 --> 00:04:12.960
00:04:13.120 --> 00:04:20.480
00:04:20.720 --> 00:04:20.959
00:04:21.040 --> 00:04:22.560
00:04:23.519 --> 00:04:30.480
00:04:30.720 --> 00:04:32.079
00:04:32.319 --> 00:04:36.240
00:04:36.399 --> 00:04:38.560
00:04:38.720 --> 00:04:42.000
00:04:42.079 --> 00:04:43.040
00:04:43.199 --> 00:04:47.439
00:04:47.600 --> 00:04:51.279
00:04:51.439 --> 00:04:53.279
00:04:53.439 --> 00:04:58.240
00:04:58.399 --> 00:04:58.639
00:04:58.800 --> 00:05:03.519
00:05:03.759 --> 00:05:04.079
00:05:04.240 --> 00:05:15.360
00:05:15.519 --> 00:05:18.160
00:05:18.319 --> 00:05:34.560
00:05:34.879 --> 00:05:53.839
00:05:54.000 --> 00:06:08.399
00:06:08.720 --> 00:06:17.439
00:06:17.519 --> 00:06:20.879
00:06:22.319 --> 00:06:29.040
00:06:29.279 --> 00:06:32.959
00:06:33.279 --> 00:06:40.959
00:06:41.120 --> 00:07:00.959
00:07:01.120 --> 00:07:12.319
00:07:12.560 --> 00:07:14.560
00:07:14.720 --> 00:07:16.639
00:07:16.959 --> 00:07:20.399
00:07:20.480 --> 00:07:24.800
00:07:24.879 --> 00:07:29.360
00:07:29.920 --> 00:07:47.439
00:07:47.519 --> 00:07:49.680
00:07:49.759 --> 00:07:53.600
00:07:53.920 --> 00:07:55.279
00:07:55.439 --> 00:08:02.319
00:08:02.560 --> 00:08:08.800
00:08:08.879 --> 00:08:16.319
00:08:16.560 --> 00:08:26.399
00:08:26.480 --> 00:08:29.279
00:08:29.519 --> 00:08:31.519
00:08:31.600 --> 00:08:39.679
00:08:40.000 --> 00:08:52.000
00:08:52.080 --> 00:08:57.120
00:08:57.279 --> 00:08:59.759
00:08:59.919 --> 00:09:04.559
00:09:04.799 --> 00:09:11.600
00:09:11.919 --> 00:09:14.240
00:09:14.320 --> 00:09:17.759
00:09:17.919 --> 00:09:22.720
00:09:22.879 --> 00:09:28.480
00:09:31.279 --> 00:09:34.159
00:09:34.320 --> 00:09:35.200
00:09:35.519 --> 00:09:44.960
00:09:45.120 --> 00:09:48.080
00:09:48.240 --> 00:09:54.000
00:09:54.159 --> 00:10:12.159
00:10:12.320 --> 00:10:18.960
00:10:19.200 --> 00:10:22.799
00:10:23.039 --> 00:10:32.000
00:10:32.080 --> 00:10:34.159
00:10:34.399 --> 00:10:40.879
00:10:40.960 --> 00:10:41.679
00:10:41.840 --> 00:10:43.919
00:10:44.080 --> 00:10:47.519
00:10:47.679 --> 00:10:47.840
00:10:48.000 --> 00:10:52.080
00:10:52.159 --> 00:10:53.759
00:10:54.159 --> 00:10:56.320
00:10:56.480 --> 00:10:58.639
00:10:58.720 --> 00:11:01.919
00:11:02.000 --> 00:11:04.879
00:11:05.039 --> 00:11:11.519
00:11:11.759 --> 00:11:15.919
00:11:16.240 --> 00:11:21.039
00:11:21.440 --> 00:11:25.360
00:11:25.600 --> 00:11:27.519
00:11:27.600 --> 00:11:30.320
00:11:30.480 --> 00:11:34.000
00:11:34.080 --> 00:11:34.320
00:11:34.480 --> 00:11:40.879
00:11:41.200 --> 00:11:49.039
00:11:49.279 --> 00:11:49.600
00:11:49.759 --> 00:11:58.080
00:11:58.320 --> 00:12:00.000
00:12:00.240 --> 00:12:06.240
00:12:06.320 --> 00:12:12.159
00:12:12.320 --> 00:12:15.919
00:12:18.159 --> 00:12:19.840
00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:22.399
00:12:22.639 --> 00:12:22.879
00:12:23.120 --> 00:12:30.480
00:12:30.639 --> 00:12:37.919
00:12:38.000 --> 00:12:43.919
00:12:44.080 --> 00:12:50.080
00:12:50.240 --> 00:12:59.200
00:12:59.360 --> 00:13:02.720
00:13:02.960 --> 00:13:04.559
00:13:04.720 --> 00:13:12.879
00:13:13.120 --> 00:13:20.320
00:13:21.039 --> 00:13:25.440
00:13:25.519 --> 00:13:30.480
00:13:31.039 --> 00:13:36.240
00:13:36.320 --> 00:13:40.320
00:13:40.559 --> 00:13:41.600
00:13:41.759 --> 00:13:42.559
00:13:42.799 --> 00:13:53.519
00:13:53.679 --> 00:13:53.840
00:13:54.080 --> 00:13:55.679
00:13:55.840 --> 00:14:01.919
00:14:02.080 --> 00:14:02.240
00:14:02.480 --> 00:14:04.159
00:14:04.320 --> 00:14:10.639
00:14:10.879 --> 00:14:12.960
00:14:13.440 --> 00:14:22.639
00:14:22.960 --> 00:14:30.960
00:14:31.039 --> 00:14:35.679
00:14:35.840 --> 00:14:41.600
00:14:41.759 --> 00:14:45.120
00:14:45.200 --> 00:14:47.039
00:14:47.360 --> 00:14:48.399
00:14:50.879 --> 00:14:53.120
00:14:53.279 --> 00:14:55.200
00:14:55.440 --> 00:14:56.559
00:14:56.639 --> 00:15:02.480
00:15:02.879 --> 00:15:05.039
00:15:05.759 --> 00:15:14.960
00:15:15.120 --> 00:15:23.120
00:15:23.279 --> 00:15:27.120
00:15:27.360 --> 00:15:31.600
00:15:32.240 --> 00:15:40.799
00:15:40.960 --> 00:15:45.759
00:15:46.000 --> 00:15:48.399
00:15:48.639 --> 00:15:49.519
00:15:50.240 --> 00:15:50.639
00:15:50.799 --> 00:16:02.080
00:16:02.240 --> 00:16:05.840
00:16:06.000 --> 00:16:12.320
00:16:12.559 --> 00:16:18.720
00:16:18.960 --> 00:16:19.120
00:16:19.279 --> 00:16:27.840
00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:34.159
00:16:34.240 --> 00:16:39.919
00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:44.399
00:16:44.480 --> 00:16:44.799
00:16:45.120 --> 00:16:49.440
00:16:49.679 --> 00:16:50.000
00:16:50.159 --> 00:16:53.679
00:16:53.759 --> 00:17:06.319
00:17:06.480 --> 00:17:17.359
00:17:17.440 --> 00:17:24.960
00:17:25.200 --> 00:17:26.720
00:17:27.039 --> 00:17:32.880
00:17:33.200 --> 00:17:43.920
00:17:44.079 --> 00:17:54.799
00:17:55.119 --> 00:17:57.200
00:17:57.279 --> 00:18:02.240
00:18:02.480 --> 00:18:07.519
00:18:07.680 --> 00:18:08.000
00:18:08.160 --> 00:18:16.640
00:18:16.799 --> 00:18:21.519
00:18:21.599 --> 00:18:22.799
00:18:23.039 --> 00:18:23.839
00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:24.799
00:18:24.960 --> 00:18:25.440
00:18:25.839 --> 00:18:30.559
00:18:30.799 --> 00:18:35.440
00:18:35.599 --> 00:18:35.759
00:18:35.920 --> 00:18:39.680
00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:44.240
00:18:44.400 --> 00:18:44.640
00:18:44.799 --> 00:18:46.160
00:18:46.240 --> 00:18:55.599
00:18:59.440 --> 00:18:59.920